Happy Birthday To My 1st Born! Heather-As Long As I’m Living My Baby You’ll Be
My Dearest Heather,
To day is your birthday and on this special day I am writing you a letter. You were born 41 years ago today and I can remember that day as if it were yesterday. Which is pretty amazing as now a days I sometimes can’t remember what happened an hour ago.
I was very young, too young to be a mother really, when you came into this world screaming at the top of your lungs but a mommy was the only thing in this universe that I ever wanted to be and you made all my dreams come true. Starting life 3 weeks late, (the theory goes you were doing your hair and your makeup), we learned how to get through life together. You survived me putting the diapers on you backwards for the first week, being dressed in head to toe pink and still being called a boy and all the trials and tribulations that go along with being a first time mom, and being the oldest child.
Even though I was not quite as prepared as in my mind I imagined myself to be, we managed to muddle through together somehow and by the grace of God, you grew into the incredible, determined, beautiful woman with the deepest compassion for others that your are today. You were my hope my dreams, and my proof of how wonderful life can be and always will you and me show and inspire me each and every day how life should be lived.
I have tried and failed no less than a dozen times this week to write down how I feel about you my daughter. This is what I finally have to say:
Today is your birthday and of course, I am in shock at how fast the time has gone. You have grown up to be a wonderful young lady and I cherish each moment I get to spend time with you and be your Mommy. Birthdays of your children also push you into a state of reflection because right after you see how much time has gone by and how quickly it evaporated-you began to question the results of your parenting and evaluate how you can do better.
It is hard to describe how much you love someone when you first look at them. Now it’s hard to describe how I feel about you growing up so quickly.
Every child’s birthday causes parents to pause and remember. I’m certainly no different. I can still clearly remember the day you came into this world.
You’ll always be my first-born baby!
When your first-born comes along you wonder how you could ever love anything as much as you do her but when the 2nd comes along you get it. You fall in love all over again.
I can’t adequately express to you how very grateful I am for your birth and your life.’
God sent me a gift once. A gift, that filled my existence with love, joy and happiness. That gift was everything. That gift was you So many times as parents, we make the mistake of pushing our children into an assumed state and hope that they assume we love them because of the things we do, the things we allow, and the things we buy. Today, I did not want YOU to assume-I want you to know just how much I love you and how much you mean to me.
I wish for you the stars. I wish for you everything and then add to that infinity. I wish great love for you, wherever you find it. I wish that your dreams, whatever they may be, come true and if they don’t, that you make them happen. I wish for you all of the beauty of the world, but the sadness too, because sadness makes you stronger and sadness makes the happy moments seem even more joyful.
You have made the darkness in my heart light up brighter than I ever thought possible. You give me a reason to live and try each and every day. I cannot thank our Lord enough for blessing me with you. And as blessings come, so do disappointments. There are trials and rewards throughout everyone’s life. You have helped me through the most difficult times of my life. I can only pray you will allow me to be there for yours.
Years have passed and you’ve grown and become a lovely woman. A very forgiving and gracious woman. You know me. You know my weaknesses. Yet you love me. deeply.
Above all, I want you to know how much we all love you with all of our hearts!
Reach to the Stars and Always Believe!
I love you
Yes, mommy has a website!